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Matchsticks and Cobblestones Jonathan Brett

Description

Edana’s father throws her out onto the streets of London in the middle of winter with nothing but matchsticks to sell. When she strikes a match, she finds herself looking into her future. But seeing the future does not make her any safer as she sees monsters, magic, and a war that is both new and ancient.

Length

  • 59581 words
  • About 238 pages
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Swoon Index Ranking

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  • Tears

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  • Thrills

    10

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11 comments on "Matchsticks and Cobblestones"

Sara.Blevins on Feb. 23, 2017, 8:45 a.m. said:

Sara.Blevins


I definitely found myself completely enthralled by the world you created, which for me is the most important aspect of any narrative. Edana is a very well-developed character, not over-powered but strong and independent in her own right. I thought her growth was subtle and realistic. I think that in general it is a rarity to find someone who does action sequences well and I really appreciated how you handled the flow of the story--moving it from "lesson to lesson" as it seems. If I had a suggestion, it would be that Hans could use a bit more development. I liked the growing attraction that I suspected between Edana and Hans but I felt like it could have used a few more direct interactions to flesh it out. Overall, though, I thought this was an excellent story and would love to read more.

I actually thought that it had a flow kind of close to Harry Potter--very different takes on magic and world view, but I thought it had overlaps.

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Sara.Blevins on Feb. 21, 2017, 6:01 p.m. said:

Sara.Blevins


I'll be honest, I'm a sucker for a "revisionist" style story which is built upon a pre-existing fairy-tale or myth and I've thought for a long time that there was something that could be done with The Little Matchstick Girl, though with how tragic and terrifying the original is, I'm a bit frightened to read on. I really like the subtle allusions to the original, while simultaneously making it your own. If I had a suggestion, I would say that the time-jump without SOME warning between chapters can be a bit unsettling, but I don't see any real reason that it needs to be explicit. I'm anxious to continue unraveling your character development as the story unfolds. Looking forward to more at this point.

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MareneaM on Feb. 18, 2017, 5:18 p.m. said:

MareneaM


I really enjoyed the story line and would liked a little more detail about Edana's mother and her talents...behind the scene of Edna's training and how/why her powers are enhancing so quickly.
Will there be follow up book of this story?

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Jonathan Brett on Feb. 21, 2017, 8:35 p.m. said:

Jonathan Brett


I plan on writing a trilogy...if this one actually goes somewhere. Each one gets deeper into Edana's family's past and builds in more of the King Arthur legend.

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Maykathryn on Feb. 17, 2017, 6:14 p.m. said:

Maykathryn


I love the premise of this book. It reminds me of The Night Circus and Howl's Moving Castle and The Magicians. Mr. Ashstaff is awesome! His banter with Edana is very charming. I do feel like this manuscript needs more sensory details. When there was a lot of high action it tended to be heavy in dialogue and I lost some of the urgency of the moment. I do miss some of Edana's emotional responses - like when she cries after moving in that's such a strong moment but others feel rushed. I think with such a wonderful and expansive concept I'd enjoy a fuller and maybe even slightly slower paced approach. Again, I think this an awesome plot with great details! Best of luck.

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jgabriel on Feb. 17, 2017, 12:15 p.m. said:

jgabriel


So far, so good. Though questions arise. Can she read the future in any fire or only the fire from a match? If her mother had the same gift, why would she stay with Edana's father? But I'm enjoying it enough to suspend disbelief and read on.

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Didi on Feb. 16, 2017, 6:33 a.m. said:

Didi


It felt like there was a gap between this chapter and the first one. It's also missing details. Other than that, the story seems promising.

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Didi on Feb. 15, 2017, 5:01 a.m. said:

Didi


I read the first chapter. Interesting premise. I had trouble visualizing the setting. Try setting the scene. It can help set the mood for your and make it easier to get into. To set the scene, try describing the weather, the character's surrounding, background noises, etc. Don't add too much detail, though. Add the detail you think will best set the mood without boring your reader. I like the idea of the main character's ability to see the future in the matches, and I look forward to continuing the story. 🙂

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Jonathan Brett on Feb. 16, 2017, 7:18 p.m. said:

Jonathan Brett


Thank you. I will work on that.

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Maykathryn on Feb. 14, 2017, 6:34 p.m. said:

Maykathryn


I'm really interested so far, especially after chapter two. Generally when information, like what she sees in those matches, gets blatantly held back from the reader as a tease I get a little irked. (I know it's a useful device it's just a pet peeve of mine.) But everything else from your characters to the name The Merlin Group has me wanting to read more so far!

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