The Love Life of: Tamara from Awkward
Awkward is a TV show that began as a kind of bad Juno ripoff teen comedy (minus pregnancy) and eventually turned into a hilariously over-the-top (and, dare I say, smart) look at high school. The main character, Jenna Hamilton, is our Ellen Page replacement, and her BFF Tamara, or “T” as Jenna calls her, is our Olivia Thirlby, and of course, between the two of them, they have slang and lingo for days. It’s only a 30 minute show, so it’s an easy commitment, and it can be pretty funny. (Way to really sell it, Summer. Sorry guys, it really IS a good show, but Jenna is bumming me out this season with her drama.) However, we know I love a good supporting character, so screw Jenna Hamilton, today we are talking about Tamara.
The Love Life of Tamara Kaplan!
Tamara is a good friend, fashion icon, and all-around fun girl, but she can probably be best described by looking at an assortment of her own trailblazing wordsmithery:
- You need to back off, as in, put your thing down, flip it, and reverse it.
- Can well hit shuffle on that subject?
- YASAP… yesterday, as soon as possible.
- You need to end this flirtationship!
Yep. She’s THAT girl. Let’s get into her love life.
In spite of her questionable taste in One Direction members (the correct answer is: Harry. Zayn. Louis. Liam. Niall. In that order.), Tamara is one of my favorite characters on Awkward. And, let’s get down to brass tacks here, as this show turns Jenna into more and more of an unsympathetic anti-heroine, Tamara and the rest of the cast need to be given more to do YASAP or this show will literally bring about it’s own demise, riding on a flat tire in the fast lane to cancellationtown. (<-Eh. I tried. Barely. I’m no Tamara.)
Prospect #1: Ricky Schwartz (Swoon Level: The worst)
Ricky and Tamara kept hooking up at the beginning of this show, until he started hooking up with another girl, and also everyone. Ricky was hooking up with everyone. He also kissed Jenna once at a party but I barely remember it. By the end Tamara just basically hated Ricky Schwartz. Everyone hated him. If there was an “I Hate Ricky Schwartz” club, Tamara would be the president, but far from the only member.
*~*~*~*~AWKWARD SPOILER ALERT*~*~*~*~*~ (get it? ha!)
This guy actually DIES in the first episode of the third season of a peanut allergy no one knew about. And then everyone thinks they “killed” him by accidentally giving him peanuts. This show is so ridiculous but who cares, the important thing is, did you notice that in that gif, Tamara is wearing an honest-to-goodness CANDY NECKLACE??? I mean, that’s all that really matters.
Also, at his “memorial” barbeque thing, everyone lets off steam by talking about how much they hated Ricky Schwartz. It’s totally amazing and totally weird, but this show doesn’t have the firmest grip on reality, so it doesn’t feel as terrible as it sounds.
Like I said, everyone hated Ricky.
Prospect #2: Jake Rosati (Swoon Level: We hooked up on our study abroad trip, this is definitely forever)
Tamara and Jake even dating at all is a breach of the Girl Code, because Jenna and Jake used to date way back in the first season when Jake was the “nice guy” in a love triangle with Jenna, Jake, and Jake’s BFF Matty.
But when you go on a Parisian study abroad trip together and there’s nothing between you, your BFF’s ex, and acting out the baguette swordfight scene from Passport to Paris in front of the Eiffel tower? THINGS HAPPEN, PEOPLE. And sometimes, that thing is love. LOVE HAPPENS.
Anyway they come back all over each other, become that couple you hate who say “Je t’aime” in unison to each other when they leave the cafeteria. In Southern California.
All is fine and rosy in “Hashtag Jakara” land until they hit a bit of a speedbump when they both run for student council president and make these great campaign videos:
The Future is Tamara! (Tamara’s Campaign Video)
I’d vote for her, but mostly I just want to go to a Zero Dark Drrrty dance.
Jake Rosati, the Right Catch! (Jake’s Campaign Video)
When in doubt, pull a Teen Wolf and have a dude take his shirt off.
And this hilarious exchange during the campaign speeches:
But they eventually get back together out of necessity because Jenna was “Amanda Bynesing” (Tamara’s words, not mine), and the rest of the gang needed to team up and help her. So I guess Jenna’s antics had a silver lining.
The second silver lining is that since they got back together, I got to talk about Tamara on this blog, and since Tamara once mentioned Niall, I got to talk about One Direction on this blog, which has secretly been my goal since the beginning. It’s all about priorities. Keeping my eye on the prize and all that.