Staff Stories: Make-ups, Break-ups, and Everything in Between — Funny First Break-up Stories

It’s not ALL work around the Swoon Reads headquarters. We’ve discovered that it’s also very important to have long gossipy conversations around the metaphorical water cooler. Thus, we’ve compiled a list of burning questions for our Swoon Staff members to answer. And, we’d love for you to join us! Share your answers in the comments. This week’s question is:

Do you have a funny story about your first break-up?

“My first Mick Jagger boyfriend and I went to a high school play (this was senior year of high school). He went to the bathroom and never came back.” — Jean F.

“It definitely involved dancing around my best friend’s room singing ‘I Will Survive’ while making R.E.S.P.E.C.T. stickers.” — Lauren B.

“My first ever break up was in 5th grade. He dumped me via post-it note. Burn.” — Johanna K.

“I tried to convince my best friend to do it for me, but she wouldn’t, so I sat in her bedroom and called him to break up with him… 4 days before Valentine’s Day.” — Liz J.

“No. My brain blocks all that out. I don’t even remember why I’m not still with my 5th grade boyfriend!” — Kate F.

“No, but I do have a sad, weepy story that will eventually be a YA novel full of life lessons.” — Holly R.

“My first high school boyfriend tried to break up with me after only a month of dating. By sending me an e-mail. I was a feisty 15-year-old and would have none of it, so I called him up as soon as I read the e-mail. He backtracked and took it back. But I got another e-mail that he was serious. This time when I called him, I only had two words to say and they are not appropriate to print here.” — Kathryn L.

“The year was 2001, and I was at a movie theater. The movie was LOTR: The Fellowship of the Ring. I went there with my first boyfriend. I’m kidding, I went there with my mom. I met my boyfriend at the movie, in secret. I bet you can see where this is going… yes, Legolas the elf was my first boyfriend. He had a blond wig and a bow and arrow and he was BEAUTIFUL. Legolas and I broke up shortly after The Return of the King came out. It was messy and I was really emotional, mostly because I thought he was leaving me forever (the Pirate movies don’t count because no wig, no party) but also because Howard Shore’s score was phenomenal and also because I was studying for finals and that really brings your emotions to the surface 24/7. Lately I’ve been seeing him around in some Hobbit movie but it’s just awkward now because I’ve moved on, you know?” — Summer O.

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